372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
372 Pages We'll Never Get Back is a podcast series created by Michael J. Nelson (of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and RiffTrax fame) and Conor Lastowka (writer for RiffTrax and novelist). Beginning in 2017 with Ernest Cline's Ready Player One (the titular 372-page book), the podcast discusses literature that the two men "are probably going to hate,"[1][2][3] though they have stated they end up enjoying some books much more than others.
372 Pages We'll Never Get Back | |
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Presentation | |
Starring | Michael J. Nelson Conor Lastowka |
Genre | Literary criticism, satire |
Language | English |
Length | typically 90–150 minutes per episode |
Production | |
Theme music composed by | Conor Lastowka |
Audio format | MP3 |
No. of seasons | 24 |
No. of episodes | 140 |
Publication | |
Original release | September 1, 2017 |
Related | |
Related shows | RiffTrax Like Trees Walking |
Website | 372pages |
Episodes
Season | Episodes | Dates | Book | Summary |
---|---|---|---|---|
1 | 1–8 | September 1 – October 27, 2017 | Ready Player One — Ernest Cline | Bestselling novel, set in a dystopian future where a young man immerses himself in a virtual world based on 1980s pop culture and partakes in a competition for fame and fortune. |
2 | 9–16 | January 26 – March 23, 2018 | Armada — Ernest Cline | A teenager plays an online video game about defending against an alien invasion, only to find out that the game is a simulator to prepare him against an actual alien invasion. |
3 | 19–21 | October 12–26, 2018 | The Eye of Argon — Jim Theis | Sword and sorcery short story about the barbarian Grignr and his adventures. |
4 | 22–29 | November 2, 2018 – January 16, 2019 | TekWar — William Shatner and Ron Goulart | A science fiction detective novel set in the future, with robots and cyborgs abounding. |
5 | 30–33 | February 4–27, 2019 | The Forensic Certified Public Accountant and the Cremated 64-SQUARES Financial Statements — Dwight David Thrash CPA FCPA CGMA | Self-published novel about a Certified Public Accountant who attempts to solve the destruction of a skyscraper by the "Cat-Burglar Terrorist". |
6 | 34–38 | March 11 – April 11, 2019 | Bob Honey Who Just Do Stuff — Sean Penn | Political satire by Oscar-winning actor notorious for its "experimental" prose style. |
7 | 39–47 | May 6 – July 1, 2019 | The Mister — E. L. James | Romance novel by the bestselling author of the Fifty Shades series about a British aristocrat who falls in love with his house cleaner from Albania. |
8 | 48–53 | July 15 – September 3, 2019 | Trucking Through Time — Charles E. Harris | A self-published novel about time traveling truck drivers. |
9 | 54–58 | September 16 – October 23, 2019 | The Lair of the White Worm — Bram Stoker | Edwardian-era horror novel by the author of Dracula about a mysterious monster threatening rural Derbyshire. |
10 | 59–67 | November 13, 2019 – January 30, 2020 | Shadow Moon — Chris Claremont and George Lucas | Fantasy novel forming a sequel to the 1988 film Willow. |
11 | 68–70 | February 18 – March 10, 2020 | Moon People — Dale M. Courtney | Self-published science fiction romance novel. |
12 | 71–77 | April 6 – June 3, 2020 | Digital Fortress — Dan Brown | Mystery/thriller novel on the theme of government surveillance and cryptography. |
13 | 78–80 | June 30 – July 24, 2020 | My Immortal — Tara Gilesbie | Notorious Harry Potter fanfic in which the characters are depicted as goths and preps. |
14 | 81–88 | August 7 – November 13, 2020 | Midnight Sun — Stephenie Meyer | Retelling of the young adult vampire romance Twilight from the point-of-view of Edward Cullen. |
15 | 89–95 | November 26, 2020 – February 26, 2021 | Ready Player Two — Ernest Cline | Sequel to Ready Player One; Wade Watts finds a new advancement in Halliday's vaults that could change the world. |
16 | 96–99 | March 23 – April 30, 2021 | The Quilters Push Back: Miranda Hathaway Adventure #7 — Mary Devlin Lynch, Debbie Devlin Zook and Beth Devlin-Keune | Cozy mystery in which a team of quilters face the American opioid crisis. |
17 | 100–107 | May 20 – September 17, 2021 | Modelland — Tyra Banks and Michael Salort | A young aspiring model attends a magical boarding school for models. |
18 | 108–112 | October 8 – November 19, 2021 | Irene Iddesleigh — Amanda McKittrick Ros | Victorian melodrama long ridiculed for its purple prose: a young English lady marries an older man, realizes she doesn't love him, and then elopes to America with her tutor. |
19 | 113–119 | December 10, 2021 – March 23, 2022 | Antigua: The Land of Fairies, Wizards and Heroes (Part 1) — Denise Brown Ellis and Larry Ellis | Self-published children's fantasy novel in which warrior princesses fight an evil dragon. |
20 | 120–124 | April 1 – June 17, 2022 | Gump and Co. — Winston Groom | Sequel to the 1986 novel Forrest Gump, published one year after that book's movie adaptation. |
21 | 125–130 | July 8 – October 21, 2022 | Super Constitution — Charles Kim | Science-fiction novel about the formation of a single world government by technological means. |
22 | 131–134 | November 8 – December 23, 2022 | Murder in Christmas River: A Christmas Cozy Mystery — Meg Muldoon | Christmas-themed cozy mystery about the murder of a man behind a pie shop during a gingerbread house building competition. |
23 | 135–139 | January 18 – March 24, 2023 | Edison's Conquest of Mars — Garrett P. Serviss | 19th-century science fiction, considered the first space opera, in which Thomas Edison leads Earth in a war against Martian invaders. |
24 | 140– | April 11, 2023 – | Artemis — Andy Weir | Sequel to The Martian. Set in the late 2080s in Artemis, the first and so far only city on the Moon. |
Reception

In 2017, Marc Hershon of Vulture.com wrote, "While I actually enjoyed breezing through Cline's tribute to pop culture of latter half of the 20th century, I can't deny a certain pleasure in reliving it through 372 Pages' comedically brutal thrashing."[4]
The A.V. Club's Mike Vanderbilt interviewed Nelson and Lastowka in 2018.[5]
In 2019, Alice Nuttall of Book Riot wrote, "Nelson and Lastowka spin bad books into gold. Listening to an episode is like sitting in on a reading group run by people who are much funnier than you are."[6] In 2020 Emily Martin compared it to How Did This Get Made?.[7]
In 2020, E. A. Henson of Biff Bam Pop! reviewed it positively, saying "372 Pages manages to avoid those common podcast pitfalls and hilarious[ly] transcend the source material" and that "[T]hese books are so amazingly bad that they almost seem like some kind of outsider art."[8]
References
- "'Ready Player Two' Tried to Kill Our Love of the '80s. It Didn't Work". www.yahoo.com. Retrieved 2021-02-13.
- "Ready Player One represents the worst in modern pop culture fandom". The Comeback. 2018-03-26. Retrieved 2021-02-13.
- Roberts, Synovia (2020-04-13). "Podcasts That Will Replace Book Club". bookstr.com. Retrieved 2021-02-13.
- Wright, Megh (October 12, 2017). "This Week in Comedy Podcasts: Larry Wilmore and Michael Bennett on 'Black on the Air'". Vulture.
- Vanderbilt, Mike. "Exclusive: It's game over when RiffTrax alums take on Ernest Cline and Ready Player One". News.
- Book Riot
- Martin, Emily (May 11, 2020). "Science Fiction Podcasts: 15 You Can Listen to Right Now".
- Henson, E. A. (April 22, 2020). "Heroes & Villains: Archie vs Predator II, 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back". biffbampop.com.