How to Be Happy With Your Body

Last Updated: November 13, 2021 References

Being happy in your own skin isn't always easy, and everyone feels unhappy about their body every now and then. But this fact should give you comfort, knowing that your unhappiness is only fleeting, and a normal worry to have here and there. Letting go of this worry is about recognizing your own beauty and loving yourself for what you are. The best way to be happy in your body is to stop letting your insecurities rule your life.

Method 1

Method 1 of 2:

Recognizing How Great You Look

1
Find 1-3 qualities about your body that you love. Check yourself out from eyes to toes, noting everything that makes you smile, no matter how small. The urge to be critical about things you don’t like will be high, but that’s okay! When you feel yourself getting critical simply move on down your body. Don’t even give these critical thoughts the time of day, and certainly don’t harp on them.^{[1]
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- If you’re convinced that “there is nothing to love” about your body, then you need to slow down. From beautiful rose cheeks to strong, powerful legs, really admire yourself instead of jumping straight to negatives.
- Love yourself first, and loving your body will only get easier.
2
Make a list of things you love about yourself beyond your body. Cover all of your amazing qualities to see that it isn’t all about your exterior. A big issue with people’s self-esteem is that they start to believe the only thing that matters is their body, putting too much weight on their appearances and not who they are overall.^{[2]
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Expert Source

Adam Dorsay, PsyD
Licensed Psychologist
Expert Interview. 11 April 2019.}
- You don’t judge people purely on their body, and people don’t do the same to you.
- Practice expressing gratitude for yourself to develop better self-esteem and be happier.
- Attractiveness is not determined by your appearance only. In study after study, participants are ranked as more attractive after people get to know them, and know they are a good person.^{[3]
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3
Keep clean and hygienic, taking some time to pamper yourself each day. Simply looking and smelling nice each day will do wonders for your self-esteem. Furthermore, take a few minutes each day to develop your own routine. It can be a facial cream, a slow, hot shave, or simply moisturizing before bed. When you treat your body like a temple, it will start to look at feel like one too.
4
Improve your posture. It is amazing how much the way you hold yourself dictates your appearances, and even self-esteem. Good posture isn't just about looking "strong," it actually aligns your spine, muscles, and even organs to work more efficiently, meaning you feel better too. In general, you want to think of being upright to improve your posture:
- Chin up, parallel to the floor.
- Ears line up over your shoulders.
- Shoulders line up over your hips.
- Hips line up over your knees.
- Knees line up over your feet.
5
Look in the mirror each morning and remind yourself that you love yourself. A daily affirmation of how awesome you are is one of the best ways to simply, quickly, and easily reinforce the importance of you in your own life. This isn’t about looking perfect or cool, this is about you being you. And, paradoxically, this desire to just be yourself and not worry about perfection will make you more attractive!
- Give yourself a smile and remind yourself not to hate on your own best friend. It may feel a little corny at first, but that’s okay!
- At the very least, banish put-downs in front of the mirror. Don't criticize your reflection, and break the habit of doing so.^{[4]
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Method 2

Method 2 of 2:

Improving Your Body Image

1
Make a habit to exercise 3-5 days, slowly building up to 2-3 hours each week. Don’t feel like you need to jump into the gym for an hour tomorrow – rushing into difficult workouts only makes it more likely that you won’t stick with the habit. Instead, find something you love, whether it is yoga, biking, disc golf, or just walking the dog, and start incorporating it into your daily schedule.
- Even 10-15 minutes each day is a good start, and as you get stronger you’ll naturally start exercising for longer periods.
- Don’t exercise solely to lose weight, though it helps. Exercise is also proven to release stress, improve mental health and clarity, and improve feelings of self-esteem.
- Try to do 10-15 pushups and situps during commercial breaks of your favorite shows. Grab the stairs over the escalator. Anything that gets you heart pumping through the day will help.
- Picking an exercise habit you actually enjoy doing is key to sticking with it.^{[5]
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2
Eat healthy to feel healthy, improving your weight, skin, and even mental health. Even if you struggle to cut junk food, adding in more fruits and vegetables will give your the vitamins and minerals needed to feel great every day. Furthermore, it can help you replace the occasional junk food to feel more full.
- Instead of eating ice cream, have frozen yogurt or sugar-free ice cream (it's not bad at all).
- Instead of having chips of any kind, have nuts or healthy popcorn.
- Instead of having fountain drinks loaded with sugar, try sparkling water or iced tea.
3
Buy clothes that make you feel confident. The clothes you wear significantly impact how you look and feel, accentuating your favorite qualities and downplaying qualities that make you self-conscious.^{[6]
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- Trying on clothes can be a great way to have fun in your body and look at yourself in a new light.
4
Choose one part of your look you want to change and get to work. Being happy with your body doesn't mean you don't want it to change–even the happiest people are comfortable enough to say, "I know I can improve." Working on something and seeing growth is one of the best ways to improve your self esteem.^{[7]
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- For instance, you might want to cut some belly fat, clear your skin up, or work on your posture.
- Having a plan makes all issues and worries much easier to get your head around.
- Break down your goal into smaller pieces to make it feel more manageable.
- For example, start with just 10 minutes of exercise a day.
5
Flip negative thoughts on their heads, and turn them into something positive. Thoughts like “I’m lazy and useless,” “no one will ever find me attractive,” or “I hate my body” are not only hurtful and wrong, but they create traps of self-doubt. The first step to being happy with your body is to stop being your own worst enemy, which means countering these thoughts with far more realistic ideas. For example:
- ”I’m not lazy, and I’m certainly not useless. I’m already finding ways to work on my body image, being proactive where most people are not.”
- ”Saying ‘no one will ever find me attractive,’ is selfish and untrue – I can’t control others, but I can control myself, and that is one very, very attractive quality.”
- ”I am my body, and I don't hate myself. I may be unhappy right now, but I've done great, fun things, and that will only continue.
6
Don't compare yourself with others. Don't let the media and photos from the internet put you down.^{[8]
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Expert Source

Adam Dorsay, PsyD
Licensed Psychologist
Expert Interview. 11 April 2019.} Facebook and the media are notorious for creating an unrealistic standard of beauty that does not exist -- it is simply the culture of only sharing what is beautiful, even if that means Photoshopping real people to look more attractive than they really are. Try cutting your social media diet down if you're having trouble with this step.^{[9]
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- Comparing yourself with others is a fool's errand, because you can never really be or understand them and their own faults. More often than not, you're simply projecting your insecurities.
- Everyone is insecure about their body once in a while. You're not alone, and that should be comforting. If even the people you call "attractive" get unhappy about their body every now and then, then you can't put too much stock in your own self-criticism.
7
Think past the scale. Your weight is only one small, small measure of your body–and it's not a very good one! Your weight fluctuates 3-5 pounds throughout the day and month, making an accurate reading difficult. Weight is also dependent on muscle mass, height, and body type. As such, it is not a great single indicator of your health. Focus more on overall health, not the number on a scale.^{[10]
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8
Be grateful for what you have, both physically and mentally. Gratitude and thanks will make you appreciate what you have, even if you don't feel happy about it at the moment.^{[11]
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Expert Source

Adam Dorsay, PsyD
Licensed Psychologist
Expert Interview. 11 April 2019.} Remember that you have a wonderful, working body and the desire to make yourself better–neither of which should be taken for granted.^{[12]
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- If you can't get yourself to be happy with your body just yet, try to be appreciative of your opportunities first. The happiness will soon follow.

Expert Q&A

Question

How do you get over body image issues?

Adam Dorsay, PsyD
Licensed Psychologist & TEDx Speaker
Dr. Adam Dorsay is a licensed psychologist in private practice in San Jose, CA, and the co-creator of Project Reciprocity, an international program at Facebook's Headquarters, and a consultant with Digital Ocean’s Safety Team. He specializes in assisting high-achieving adults with relationship issues, stress reduction, anxiety, and attaining more happiness in their lives. In 2016 he gave a well-watched TEDx talk about men and emotions. Dr. Dorsay has a M.A. in Counseling from Santa Clara University and received his doctorate in Clinical Psychology in 2008.

Adam Dorsay, PsyD

Licensed Psychologist & TEDx Speaker

Expert Answer

Acknowledging that your negative thoughts exist gives you more power over them. Once you become aware of them and recognize that you're thinking badly about yourself, you can start to have more control over your thoughts.

Warnings

Changes won't happen overnight, especially if you aren't consistent on this.

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If you are hardcore, you will start to see changes in less than 2 weeks, and the more and more you do it, the easier it will become.

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