22 Signs You’ll Never Get Married (But Will Still Be Happy Anyway)

You don’t want to marry just anyone, and so maybe you won’t marry at all. There’s a lot to consider before getting married to someone, like your compatibility with your partner, their career, whether they want children, etc. Wanting someone who checks all the boxes isn’t a bad thing, it’s actually pretty prudent.^[2] Of course, it could mean you’ll never find anyone who does pass every test, but maybe you’re better off without them, then.

Marriage involves more promises than you’re comfortable making. You’re committing yourself to one person, and maybe even one way of life, for what might be the rest of your life. That’s a lot to ask someone, and for some people it’s too much. There are plenty of ways to express your affection and commitment to another person without making vows.^[3]

You’ve seen too many marriages end poorly. Maybe your own parents got divorced, or you have friends whose relationships ended that way. Divorce is a common occurrence, and it’s a risk you have to consider. Maybe that’s a risk you’re more comfortable not taking.^[4]

You’re not ready to give up the options that come with being single. Many marriages are monogamous, and many partners require that you only ever sleep with them. It’s totally understandable to value your own independence.^[5]

You think marriage is outdated or even a little pointless. And you’re not alone: more and more young people aren’t subscribing to what passes as “traditional” marriage.^[6] You might find the whole deal outdated–signing a contract to be together with one person indefinitely might not align with your ideals, and you could be better off looking for alternative arrangements in your romantic relationships.

You get your happiness from something other than marriage. It doesn’t need to be romantic relationship, or even any sort of relationship with another person. You might find your career fulfilling enough, or your hobbies or how you spend your time otherwise.^[7] If you’re already happy with your life as it is, why look for something you don’t need or even want?

Couples that cohabitate are less interested in getting married. There are a number of reasons this might be: one partner might not want to get married, and living with them influences the other partner’s own opinion in the same direction. Or, it could be that you and your partner are just comfortable living together without getting married, and so don’t feel the need to shake things up with a legally-binding contract.^[8] Whatever the reason, your relationship is working already, so why mess with it?

People that don’t care what others think also might not care to get married. Today, marriage is often viewed as the expected end-game of a relationship. But if you tend to defy expectations, it’s only natural for you to defy the expectation of marriage, too.^[9]

You don’t think marriage is what you want out of life, and that’s okay. Many people who aim for marriage want a long-term relationship, and even to have kids. If your interests and passions lie somewhere else, why distract yourself with marriage? There are plenty of other worthy goals to have, and many of them don’t involve a ring around your finger.^[10]

Marriage requires too much sacrifice on your own part. After all, many people who choose to get married also change their last name, and they have a whole other person to consider when making big life decisions. But you know who you are and you want to be true to yourself without compromising that.^[11]

You think your platonic relationships are just as important and meaningful. Marriage is just one of many ways to interact with and be close to people, and it’s not necessarily the best way. You might be someone who feels satisfied and fulfilled with your relationships with friends, family, and peers, and marriage doesn’t even need to factor into your social web.^[12]

Marriage is a common step to becoming a parent, but you don’t want to be a parent. In addition, many men want to wait to have kids, and many women don’t.^[13] The subject of children can be a divisive one, and maybe one you’d rather not touch at all. Not wanting kids is a dealbreaker for a lot of potential partners, but it doesn’t have to mean you throw in the towel and get hitched. You can also be in a relationship without getting married or having kids–the best of both worlds!^[14]

You don’t want to bother with marriage’s financial and relationship obligations. When you make vows, there’s plenty to consider: what to do with your money, if you’ll have children, if you’ll be monogamous. You don’t have to worry about those questions when you’re single, and not worrying about is as good an answer as any.^[15] There’s nothing wrong with wanting to keep your simplicity and freedom.

Marriage isn’t on your mind, and might never be. There are plenty of other things to worry about, and you don’t need marriage to add another one. Or maybe marriage just doesn’t fit with your own personality and interests, the way plenty of people have never considered taking up horseback riding. Whatever the reason, if marriage doesn’t seem to concern you, there’s probably no reason it should start concerning you now.^[16]

You prefer to live alone and make your own rules. Most couples who take the vows move in together as part of the expectations that come with marriage, but you’re more comfortable going it alone. Not all couples cohabitate, and plenty of couples are perfectly happy commuting to each others’ homes rather than sharing a bathroom forever.^[17]

Not having a reliable source of income can make it harder to get married. And it does make sense–much of marriage is about stability, and many potential partners are looking for a partner with decent income.^[18] But that doesn’t mean you should sacrifice the job or the lifestyle you enjoy just to make another person happy.

Marriage isn’t an option for you because your partner doesn’t want to get married. Maybe one of these reasons applies to your partner, and not necessarily to you. You can’t force your partner to get married, and so marriage might just not be a possible route for your relationship.^[19] You can still remain in a loving and committed partnership without getting up on an altar.

Many people who aren’t interested in marriage also aren’t religious. After all, many religions value marriage as a necessary step in a romantic relationship, and religious people are more likely to be in a relationship than those who aren’t.^[20] But if you’re not religious, marriage might not mean as much to you, and you might not be in such a hurry to get hitched.^[21]

People who come from nontraditional families are more likely to forego marriage. If you come from a home that existed outside the model of the nuclear family, it could be that marriage just isn’t your cup of tea.^[22] And if that unconventional home life worked for you as a kid, why shouldn’t it work as an adult?

Your sexual needs aren’t compatible with many people’s understanding of marriage. Many married people expect sex to be a regular component of their relationship, but your sexuality doesn’t factor sex into the picture at all. It can be tough (but not impossible!) to find an understanding partner.^[23] In the meantime, consider the upsides of being single!